


Paralogue 0.2 - What I Used to See

by Sylvas



Series: Cinders of the Emblem [2]
Category: Fire Emblem Heroes
Genre: F/F, Gay Awakening, there's the smutty part! we got there folks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-24
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-05-27 16:26:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15028568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sylvas/pseuds/Sylvas
Summary: Catria's always hated talking to noblewomen. She gets in her own head thinking about how beautiful and graceful they always are, and how... absolutely not those things she is. How would a mere career soldier like her ever NOT feel horribly inadequate?But better that than the way she could barely contain herself around Marth. Anything would be better than that embarrassment.





	1. Chapter 1

_February 21_

 

Those that have never actually seen a flight of sky knights fighting tend to imagine romantic scenes of flying high over a castle's walls to decimate the resistance within, opening the way for one's allies. That was what people seemed to expect, in Catria's experience, at least - pegasi were to lead a charge by overcoming worldly fortifications with supreme grace and beauty. You could fly, so you should be flying, as if value came from height.

That wasn't true at all. 

The Whitewings kept low to the ground during the siege. You can't fly high in a place like this - archers are looking for you, you _specifically_ , and even if a knight is tough target to hit, her pegasus certainly isn't. You wait for ground forces to clear out the walls and then make swift hops over safe walls, at best. But mostly... the strength of a pegasus knight isn't the ability to soar over the battlefield; it's just to make much larger hops and faster manuevers than a grounded horse can. They leapt deftly over rubble or sandbags to corner their enemies, moving with a practiced coordination that only came with a great deal more experience than their youth suggested - save in Minerva's case, of course, who smashed aside armored batteries with the same nonchalance that she flipped wholly over a myrmidon's head to outmanuever him. She was, as ever, something to behold. 

Once the courtyard was clear, the Whitewings returned to formation as their commanding officers followed from the outer wall. The Order of Heroes' tactician moved with the royalty of Askr close at hand, acting as half advisors, half bodyguards - after all, Kiran was essentially the only member of the Order incapable of defending herself. Either way, they approached Catria with fast steps - Catria, specifically? Not the others? She guided her pegasus to drop back to the ground level so they could speak. "How can I help?" 

"You've done great here," Kiran began, gesturing to the others as well. "Catria - I need you to rendezvous with a special team that's punching through enemy lines to reach the Marquesses." 

Catria's eyebrows rose. "Just me?" 

"I need everyone else here," Kiran confirmed. "But the strike team is in over their heads. You're the knight for the job." 

Catria caught herself puffing up over the praise; underneath her hood, she also caught Kiran smiling. "Alright," she said, reining herself in. "Where will I find them?" 

"They should be near the throne room now." They nodded upwards, behind Catria - she turned to see a woman with a bright yellow scarf and dark hair crouching on the wall above her, watching them. "Kagero will guide you there." 

Catria blinked at the assassin, rather surprised. She'd heard that Kiran wasn't being allowed to retain a force of spies, but from just a glance at her attire, that was clearly Kgaero's role. Either way, that was a curiosity out of her reach. "Ma'am," she said instead, turning back to Kiran, "I'd be concerned about archers flying up at the wall level..." 

Kiran nodded. "Kagero will clear a path for you. They're in danger up there, we're in a rush and need to take risks." She leaned in and lowered her voice. "That's part of why I chose you," she added lowly. "You're more manueverable than the others." Catria nodded faintly, taken aback and frankly not sure she agreed. She wouldn't want Est anywhere near anything that even resembled an arrow, but Palla and Minerva were certainly much more capable than she was... 

"Alright, I'll hurry," she said, guiding her mount to turn and leaping up beside her guide; Kagero, without speaking, vanished and reappeared near another length of wall - as Catria made to follow, an archer ducked up from cover, drawing back and angling his bow at Catria - but Kagero's knife had already found his throat. Catria gasped, pulling back on her reins and halting in mid-air out of reflex. 

"Keep up," Kagero snapped, vanishing again. 

 

Just as Catria was vaulting over the last rampart, the great double door to the throne room burst open and a gout of flame and smoke billowed out - a man in a dark shawl tumbled out of it, swiftly but shakily pushing himself to his feet and trying to line up a shot with a bow of his own, aiming inside through the smoke; Catria spurred her mount on, beating her wings to clear visibility. 

"Oh, backup," the man gasped, clearly quite surprised. He had an eyepatch over the eye nearer to Catria - must be why he didn't see her at first. "About time!" 

"Is the rest of your team inside?" Catria asked, but before he could answer another tongue of fire burst from the room - Catria's pegasus shielded her considerably from the heat, but if the attack had been better aimed she might have been roasted. Thankfully, for all of their weakness to arrows, pegasi were marvellously magic-resistant by their nature. She knew better than to wait for instruction here: the threat was a fire mage, and Catria was the clear answer. Pointing her lance towards the source of the spell, she spurred her pegasus on and dashed through the doorway.

She dove into an inferno. The room was ablaze in seemingly every possible place, and filled with smoke such that Catria could only barely see her target from across the room. Her opening thrust missed as the mage danced out of its reach, crying out in surprise - she was smaller than Catria had expected? She had dark blue hair like Catria's, but long and prim, and an armored robe marked with the same symbol they'd seen on the flags flying from the castle - this was without a doubt Marquess Ostia, one of the Heroes that they'd been warned about. Catria grit her teeth. Her job was still the same. 

As Catria repositioned to the side, trying to strike from a flank as always, an arrow whizzed past the girl's shoulder from the doorway; the Marquess snapped her fingers and thrust out her arm towards the door again, another blast erupting from outstretched hand. Catria swept in to take advantage of the obvious opening, but another woman in armor stomped into her path, blocking her with a shield nearly as big as Est herself, and Catria bounced right off, her pegasus snorting with clear agitation. The knight made her own riposte, forcing Catria into a hasty block and to shuffle back further; the carpet here was alight, so she had to hover, angling her lance down at the knight, who advanced in slow, firm steps, keeping herself between Catria and the Marquess. 

Okay. This was a bit trickier. Catria weighed her options - glancing upward. The throne room... had a high ceiling... 

She lunged forward - but then stopped short, feinting, and vaulted high over the armored knight's shoulder; she thrust her lance downward as she passed overhead, not to strike her but to try to discourage any attack against her mount, but as she approached the Marquess she swiped upward. The mage blocked with her tome - her tome!! - and Catria's blow glanced off; undeterred Catria made to sweep to the side, hoping to work her way behind the mage, but another fighter leapt into her path instead - Marquess Pherae, Catria had seen him before. His weapon was shorter than Catria's, but he fought much more viciously, smashing her back into the charging armored knight - Catria again had to disengage, but now she was retreating further into the blaze and not towards the door, cut off from her ally. 

"We're not done yet!" Someone out of Catria's vision shoulder-charged into Marquess Pherae, their own shining sword meeting his; Catria didn't watch after that, instead focusing her attention on the armor knight. She wasn't a weak opponent by any means, but Catria easily danced circles around her until her lance found an opening in the girl's armor. She dropped; Catria turned her attention to Marquess Ostia, but she had taken an arrow to the stomach and fallen to her knees already. Marquess Pherae was forced into the center of the room - his opponent leveled her sword at him warningly as he tried to impose himself protectively in front of the mage. 

"We've captured the castle," said her ally. She was brandishing her blade in her left hand - her right hung at her side, blood streaming down the exposed skin. Catria shifted closer, lance at the ready. "Stand down," the woman ordered. 

The Marquess hesitated, then glanced back to the mage beside him. But her eyes were on the armored knight beside Catria. She glanced over with a start, but she hadn't moved.

"We've lost, Roy," she breathed. Marquess Pherae sighed heavily, slowly lowering his sword... then carefully placing it on the floor. 

 

Once they'd dealt with all the fires the Marquesses had caused, Catria kept them closely guarded while Kagero - Catria hadn't even realized she'd been there with them, where had she been? - brought up a healer from another unit, a young lady with a serious expression but a cheerful aura regardless, who busied herself tending to a wounded armor knight across the room from them that Catria hadn't seen in the chaos. 

Kagero took over guarding their 'captives' once the healer had arrived, and Catria dismounted to give her pegasus a bit of rest, since the fighting appeared to have stopped. As she did, The swordswoman that had cornered Roy approached her. 

This was Catria's first chance to really take her in, and she felt herself withering as she did. The stranger shone as though her face could cast light, dark blue hair cascading about her shoulders like the tumbling of a river turned fierce by a flood. She had an arresting smile, too, holding Catria in place as though commanded at attention. Even wounded, the fighter carried herself with a simple, but captivating elegance. 

"Thank you for your assistance," she said gently, her eyes locked directly on Catria's. 

"I didn't do a whole lot," Catria replied, painfully aware of her reddening face, her voice faint in the wake of the radiance in front of her. She tried not to make an ordeal out of it, but she hated being around noble women like this. It was impossible to look at someone so beautiful without feeling deeply inadequate. 

"I don't think we would have all survived that encounter without your help," the woman insisted, carefully offering her good hand; Catria hesitated at first, instinctively ashamed of the calluses on her hands from training, but she saw that the woman was wearing gloves and decided she was being absurd. "I am Lucina. Could I have your name?"

"Catria," she replied, clasping her hand and bowing stiffly, unable to take her eyes off of Lucina. "I'm impressed that you were able to outduel the Marquess with an injured arm like that. You must be very talented." 

"It wasn't as hard as it may seem," Lucina laughed shyly. Her cheeks turned sweetly pink. Catria hated it. It was so _charming_. It wasn't fair. "I got most of my advantage thanks to you arriving to divert his attention," she continued, gesturing to Catria. "You effectively forced everyone in the room to focus on you, and that helped Niles and I regain our momentum."

"I-I... see." Catria didn't really know how to respond. She ought to, but accepting praise had never really been her strong point. "I was just... doing the best I could to help." 

"You were an immense help," Lucina promised, smiling warmly. "Thank you again, Catria." 

There was an awkward silence. Catria wondered, belatedly, if she was supposed to say something. She opened her mouth, her own face growing hotter still, but in the very same moment Lucina blurted, "I-I hope we get to fight alongside one another again!" 

Catria sputtered. "W-Why?" It came out before she could really think about it, an overly honest reaction. Why should someone like her care about who she fought with? There was nothing special about Catria. 

"I-I..." But Lucina seemed just as taken aback that Catria had asked. "W-Why... would I not? I'm glad for your aid, I'm glad for everyone that fights alongside me." 

"Well, so am I," Catria added hastily. "I don't mean to say I'm not grateful or anything!" 

"Oh, that's not what I was trying to say," Lucina gasped. "I just mean that I know I can count on you, and... I..." She hesitated, looking away, crossing her good arm over her chest. "Maybe that didn't come across the way I wanted," she murmured. "I'm sorry if I've said too much."

Mercifully, Catria was not made to respond to that; the healer marched up to them and folded her arms expectantly. "Well, Exalt Lucina," she cooed, as Lucina jumped and whirled to face her. "That arm looks pretty beat up. We can't have that, can we?"

"Oh." Lucina smiled sheepishly. "Yes, I suppose not. Thank you, Lissa." She glanced back at Catria with an apologetic smile. "Thank you again." 

"I already said, you don't have to thank me," Catria huffed, rubbing the back of her neck. "Er, see you... around, I guess." 

Then she turned back to her pegasus, giving her reins a gentle pull to lead her out. She could feel her face and neck burning. _See you around, I guess_. Probably not, after a limp sendoff like that. Catria wasn't sure why she always seemed to get herself worked up around women of class like Lucina - if she just approached conversation with them casually they'd probably see her as crass and uncultured, but at least Catria wouldn't feel so embarrassed and defeated on the back end of every conversation with them. She sighed heavily, shaking her head.

"Ah, don't feel so down about it." 

Catria blinked and looked up, startled - framed against the sunlight from outside was Niles, arms folded, a devilish smirk painted on his shadowed face. "What?" Catria said blankly, unsure of what he'd even said. 

"With moves like that," he cooed, "I'm sure you've got girls from at least four kingdoms in line to chat you up."

Catria continued to stare. "What are you _talking_ about?" 

Niles snorted. "Oh, hoping to play it cool? You can't slip anything by me." He leaned in, eyes slitting ominously, his grin growing ever so slightly wider. "Fawning over some princess from a faraway kingdom, huh? What a joke. You're nothing but a sucker, falling for somebody like that." 

Catria's head felt light. She shook her head slowly, knuckles turning white around her pegasus' reins. "Nobody _asked_ for your opinion," she whispered, something hot and seething building out of her control. "I can't believe anyone here would be so rude that they'd listen in on someone else's conversation like that." 

"It's not my fault you had to slobber all over her in public," Niles chuckled, covering his mouth. Catria's fingers ached for her lance.

"Don't speak to me again," she hissed, yanking on the reins a good bit harder than she meant to - her pegasus spread her wings, startled, but Catria refused to give up face and stubbornly led her away, painfully aware of the mirth in Niles' eyes as he watched her go.


	2. Chapter 2

Niles' words haunted her. 

_Falling for somebody like that._

From any reasonable perspective, Niles' little quip was absolute nonsense. All he would have seen was Catria talking to a total stranger that had pretty much just thanked her and been on her way. So... what on earth was he even talking about? There were a few glaring problems with his conclusion, such as how likely it was that Lucina just talked so earnestly with everyone, Catria knew her type and that was just what they were like; also, _Catria was not a lesbian._

But even with that aside, Catria had only ever been in love _once._ It was something that had shocked her, even frightened her, at the time. She hadn't known how to handle it. She cringed at the memories that came with it - the few times she had awkwardly approached him, some part of her desperately hoping for some acknowledgment, even though she knew it was never going to come... and how the rest of her would just sit enthralled as they talked, listening to him, watching him, wondering, dreaming, praying, grieving. It was the worst she'd ever felt in her life. And, horrifyingly, it was the best she'd ever felt, too. 

But only once. Only once, ever. Catria was happy single. She was a soldier who worked hard for her talent because of the high expectations placed on her. Love had graced her exactly once; only one person had ever held Catria's affection, and... well... he had simply been too far out of her league. If that was the way Catria could expect her romantic prospects to play out, then there was no point to humoring her feelings afterward. They would just distract her from her work, and as a soldier, that could be deadly. Or worse. 

No, at this point, Niles' stupid joke was far more of a threat to her than 'fawning' over Lucina could ever have been. She kept replaying that short conversation in her head, wondering how on earth she'd given anyone the impression that she, Catria, a happily independent _straight_ knight accepting gratitude from someone she's helped, might be 'in love'. Nothing about the memory seemed out of place to her... but she couldn't soothe her worry. 

"Do you have trouble talking to women at all?" she asked.

Est blinked at her, wrinkling her nose and squinting as if trying to read something very small on Catria's face. She couldn't ask Palla, because Palla _was_ a lesbian. She had her weird thing going on with Minerva that they weren't supposed to talk about, anyway. "That's a weird question to ask," Est said slowly. "No?" 

"I-I mean..." Ugh. Catria shook her head. "It's like, when you're around a noblewoman and she seems like she's too pretty for you to even touch. You know?"

"Oh, yeah." Est lit up at that, and Catria couldn't help but let out her breath in relief. "It's like they're fragile, right? If you do or say the wrong thing you'll break 'em, or something. Or they'll get mad at you over something that doesn't make sense."

"Yeah, kind of like that," Catria agreed, trying to hold on to her relief, but it was fading nonetheless. "But that's... normal, right?"

"I mean, _I_ think so." Est shrugged, looking away absentmindedly. "It's better than just being a bumbling moron like most men are. I cringe watching dances and stuff, you know?" 

"Yeah," Catria laughed, "I get that." Marth hadn't been like that, though. That was why she - _Why are you thinking about Marth??? Stop it!_ "I guess Abel's not that sort, though?"

"He is, a little," Est chuckled. "But it's fine. I'm tough. I'll whip him into shape."

Catria couldn't help but laugh again. "I bet you will." 

 

She did her best to reassure herself with that, and to move on with her life. It would've been easier if she were actively fighting, but she - and her sisters, and pretty much everyone from the siege in Ostia - had been taken off active duty to rest. Catria didn't like just sitting back and doing nothing, so she kept trying to find ways to make herself useful. But in doing that, she _kept running into Lucina._

One morning she was tending to the Order's pegasi, and heard the door to the stable opening - whirling around to see Lucina looking back at her, smiling and waving. "Good morning, Catria," she said cheerfully. 

"G-Good morning," Catria said, breath knocked out of her. Lucina was just wearing the white Order robes over her usual tunic, without her stockings and with normal shoes rather than the high boots from before - it left her legs very exposed, and it was difficult for Catria not to stare, bewildered. Lucina laughed, turning a little pink again. Even with a graceless look like this she was still unbearable! 

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize anyone else would be here," Lucina admitted. "Please excuse my state of dress."

"It's fine," Catria replied stiffly, because even it were within her right to look down on Lucina for walking around with only a robe over her legs, it really just didn't bother Catria that much, to be honest.

"I just enjoy seeing pegasi once in a while. They remind me of one of my closest friends." Lucina approached one, which in turn approached her, curious. Pegasi only approach women of a certain purity of heart, or so it's said, so there was no reason whatsoever to be surprised that Lucina had their attention. "My friend's mother was a very talented pegasus knight," she continued idly, reaching up to stroke the back of its neck and turning back to Catria. "Very much like you, actually."

"Like me?" Catria said blankly, and Lucina nodded. 

"You seem like the sort of person that is very passionate about what they do," Lucina continued. "Cordelia was like that, too." Her smile seemed to turn a little bitter, and she turned her attention away again, leaving Catria to stare in wonder and shock until the pegasus she _had_ been tending to started impatiently nudging her with a hoof.

Then another afternoon a few days later, Anna had her go to sort provisions, but added as Catria began to turn away that it was certainly too big of a job for just one person, and she'd be sending someone else along after. Sure, okay, it was a big job - but Catria had handled worse. So was Anna just coddling her? Or was it an excuse to track down specifically Lucina and put them in the same room together as part of some cruel joke? 

Neither, turned out. "I meant to take care of this this morning," Lucina had said when she came in, smiling that stupid, cute bashful smile and turning that stupid, cute shade of pink. "But I got carried away in training and lost track of time... either way, thank you for your help."

"I just like having something to do," Catria mumbled, managing to avert her eyes. 

"Me, too." Lucina grunted as she hefted a crate, and Catria felt her face burning. _Why?!_ This was getting absurd. "I think Cordelia rubbed off on me that way, actually. I've never been the sort of girl to sit back and let my retainers do all of the work."

"I don't know why Anna thinks we need two people for this," Catria added, a little sourly. 

"It won't be so bad," Lucina offered. "It'll go by twice as fast this way!" Catria could positively _hear_ the radiance pouring off of her. She couldn't even look up after that.

And then a full week after Ostia, she went to stock the armory, again by request from Anna, but this time Lucina was already inside looking for practice weapons. Lucina greeted her, Catria greeted her back, and without waiting a moment more Lucina launched into conversation about _lances._ She'd always wanted to learn to use them - it was traditional for royalty from her kingdom to do so - but she'd never got the chance for her father to teach her. And then it got quiet and sad, but Lucina took the reins up again and steered them away:

"Would you spar with me?" 

"W-What?" Catria looked up at her, startled. "I - " Am in the middle of something. Catria, you can say no.

"Well, not now, of course," Lucina added hastily. "I suppose maybe it's a strange thing to ask. It's just that I learn best by practicing with someone else, especially if I know they're more talented than I am." 

Again, Catria could feel her face turning red. Her weakness for praise struck again. "I-I'm not sure I'd make the best teacher," she admitted. "I mean, I learned to fight on the ground, sure, but..."

"Most comfortable mounted," Lucina finished, just a trace of disappointment in her voice, unable to dampen her smile. "That's alright, I understand. Thank you anyway." 

_For what??_ "I'm sorry," Catria mumbled. She tried to add something after that, but there weren't really any words afterward to say. Lucina paused, waiting for her to speak. The silence grew awkward and then some. 

"I-I'm sorry to be distracting you," Lucina gasped, as if she became aware of this all at once. "I'll get out of your way, hang on." She shuffled through a moment longer, took whatever it was she'd wanted, and darted out again. 

 

"How would you teach someone to fight using a lance?" 

Palla stared at her, her arms loosely folded, a quizzical and faintly concerned expression on her face. For a moment Catria was seized by an irrational fear that Palla somehow knew everything, or had deduced it from this one question, and would start taunting Catria over a nonexistent infatuation the same way Niles had. But she didn't, she just continued to look confused. 

"That depends on who that someone is," Palla said slowly. "If they're already trained as a fighter, you'd start somewhere different than..."

"Let's say they are," Catria pressed. The question had been bothering her ever since Lucina had asked, because once she'd left the room Catria began to realize that Lucina had not asked her to "teach" her, she'd just asked to spar, and so now Catria was wondering if she was looking at even the idea of training all wrong. Did it make more sense just to spar with people until they learn from you? 

"You'd want to make sure they know how to hold it, first of all," Palla sighed, drumming her fingers thoughtfully and turning away slightly. "The basics are always the place you start - so thrusts, blocking, redirecting your momentum so you can change targets or direction, how to move your feet..."

Right - right. So Catria wasn't crazy. "That's not the sort of stuff you can learn just by sparring with someone, right?" 

"Well, I don't know, Catria, how did you learn it?" Palla smiled patiently, but didn't wait for Catria to answer. "Most people are formally trained. The lance is not a weapon you just pick up and start using, the same way an axe or a sword can be. Even for an experienced fighter, you can't take experience with a smaller weapon and just know how to use a larger one."

"Right, okay." Catria nodded, grateful, and turned away.

"Why do you ask?" 

"Someone asked about it," Catria said dismissively, trying to ignore the piercing frightened cold that filled her. "Let's talk about something else."

 

But it didn't go away. The next morning she felt tense, her skin crawling and her stomach in knots. 

An announcement rounded the castle that the active duty roster was rotating again. Catria had gone first thing in the morning, when it was still deathly quiet in the castle, and saw that she and Lucina were to be placed on the same team. Whose idea was that? Or was it just stupid, awful luck?

From there she snatched up her own lance from the armory and hurried out to the Order's training area, picking out one of the straw dummies with the intent of working out her stress on it. She'd been honest to Lucina about her specialization in mounted combat, but she made a point of doing grounded drills frequently too... not that this was one of those. This was more about trying to work out as much of her energy as she could at once. She spun about striking with broad swipes and fast thrusts, deftly twirling the lance in her hands, attacking over either shoulder, all but pirouetting in a whirlwind of attacks with both shaft and blade alike... 

Nothing about it was productive. This wasn't real practice, and she felt deeply self-conscious about that. It wasn't really like her to be childish like this, but if the increasingly weird looks Est and Palla kept giving her were any indication, apparently out-of-character behavior was becoming the norm. So what if she wanted to show off for nobody for a bit? Whose business was it but hers if this made her feel better? Nobody's. That's whose. 

"Oh!" 

Catria spun around in a fright, pointing her lance at the sound, but even before her eyes has set on its source she knew exactly who it was. Of course. Of _course._ She felt her hands shaking. This was the worst possible thing that could happen. She hurriedly propped up her lance, but couldn't decide whether or not to bow and wound up standing there awkwardly. "G-Good morning," she stammered.

"Good morning!" Lucina still seemed to be recovering from the surprise, a hand on her heart, but still smiling sunnily as ever. "You startled me! I thought I was the only one that came out here this early." 

Catria did not know what to say. She didn't move. She had an idea what Lucina was about to say, though. Sure enough: 

"I saw that we're going to be working together during the next deployment." Catria nodded numbly. "I'm looking forward to fighting alongside you again." 

"Yeah," Catria managed. She felt like she might vomit on the spot. An overwhelming tension filled the space between them; judging from Lucina's hesitation Catria thought perhaps she might be able to feel it, too, but...

"Are you feeling well?" Lucina asked lowly. "You seem out of sorts. Do you need -"

"I'm fine," Catria snapped. She wasn't, but Lucina wasn't helping. 

"O-Okay," Lucina gasped. "Well - if you're sure, um. Do you mind if I --"

"No." Catria cut her off again, shaking her head rapidly. "Just leave me alone." 

Lucina's eyes boggled. "W-What?"

"I said leave me alone!" Catria's fingers clenched white around her lance, something bitter in her throat that made it hard to control her voice. "I keep running into you and you keep talking to me as if I have any business being anywhere near someone like you and it's making me sick!" 

Now, Catria had not thought this through - it had spilled out of her in desperation - but even with no idea what to expect, Lucina's reaction still managed to surprise her; the princess looked only more distraught, and seemed to struggle for words herself. "What are you - I-I thought we... you..." 

But Catria couldn't take looking at her like that - she turned and bolted.


	3. Chapter 3

Marching had never been easy for Lucina. The tension of military affairs seeped into her core and left her cold. She had a lot of practice stifling her thoughts and feelings, focusing on just the long march and the next swordstroke. But compared to everything Lucina had been through thus far in Ylisse, Hoshido was practically a vacation, and it was hard to keep her attention on the road when there was so much beauty around her, without giving in to panicked glances at every passing movement within her range of sight. 

But the alternative to that, the only viable distraction, was... flying high above them, keeping an eye out for their quarry. Catria. 

She had already given enough heartsore sighs that Sharena had asked her if anything was wrong, so she did her best now to keep it to herself, but her wistful gaze at the sky felt incriminating enough. She just couldn't help herself. Everything about Catria was so painfully familiar, and it made Lucina's heart ache for the day when Severa would stand at her side again... but it also brought back those nauseating feelings of doubt that had enforced a certain amount of distance between them, too. The desperation for a companion, especially a grounded, respectful, but fierce and vibrant one like Severa... and the terror of being close to someone, the screaming in her heart at even the faintest suggestion of losing them. A bitter war raging in Lucina's soul, as it had been since she was a young girl who had first learned that the world was ending and her father would not be coming home to her. 

Yes, that was in a past now darkened and forgotten. She'd unmade that fate. But she couldn't undo herself, or the effect that past had had on her. It wasn't that simple. It had taken her a long time to admit that to herself, and admitting it now was still very hard. 

Maybe it was for the best then that she'd gotten the reaction that she had. A romantic connection - as much as Lucina might crave it, as much as she might daydream about it - had never been her intent, she'd just been trying to make friends in a new place, but... well, she'd never been good at hiding her feelings, so she supposed it shouldn't surprise her to push a prospective friend away. 

It's better like this, Lucina tried to tell herself, because what you have with Severa is good - you and she understand each other, and even if you stay apart she's also the closest friend you'll ever have. Just wait for her, and you'll feel better. 

And maybe that was true, but in this moment, Lucina felt guilty. Really... above all else, that was the reigning emotion. Guilty to have pushed herself on Catria. To have been blind to the one-sidedness of her feelings. Those things deserved an apology that, so far, Lucina hadn't had either the privacy or the bravery to really give to her yet. 

The march halted atop a hill, as Fort Jinya came into view ahead of them. Kiran began to pace their meager formation, reviewing their strategy for taking the fort as quickly as possible, before Emblians could reinforce it. The task ahead came into focus, and Lucina allowed it to push her feelings aside. For now, and hopefully, for quite a while. 

 

Even without Emblian reinforcements, Hoshido put up quite a defense. Lucina tried not to think too deeply on that zeal during the battle. The salvation of her world, and all worlds, depended on scuttling Hoshidan emplacements until Princess Veronica was forced to leave the country entirely; she had to focus on just that objective. But now, as resistance was dying down, Lucina found it hard not to make a comparison between these people, defending their home from outsiders, and... well... her own people. Herself. 

Yes, these people were being controlled - directly, more or less - by Veronica. But they never flinched. They never held back. Kiran insisted that talking to them was pointless, that they'd already tried and that these 'anti-heroes' had sworn themselves to Veronica's service already. But that idea bothered Lucina. If Veronica was such a villian... why would these people, otherwise seemingly of sound mind and heart, pledge themselves to her? 

She heard a clash of steel - eager not to dwell on her thoughts she dashed around the partition that separated her from the sound. But by the time she had taken in the melee, Catria's lance had already skewered the soldier; with a sweep of her arm she brushed him aside, and with a flourish she returned the weapon to her side, looking up with a dull, casual glare at Lucina as though nothing were amiss. 

"It's good to see you're well," Lucina offered, almost by reflex, trying her best not to make her staring too obvious. The pegasus knight looked so totally unfazed, so... comfortable, in battle... self-assured... 

"You as well," Catria said, but her voice was soft and toneless. 

The sound of it cut through Lucina, so sudden that it staggered her. She closed her eyes and took a breath, feeling her composure falter. She could hear Catria's pegasus drag its hoof against the ground. "Hey," Catria gasped, "hey, what's wrong?" But her voice was high-pitched and crooning, very clearly speaking to her mount; when Lucina looked up again Catria had dismounted, trying to calm her. "You're stressing her out for some reason," Catria murmured, glancing over to Lucina. "Is something up?" 

Lucina drew herself up, slowly letting her breath out. She supposed there would be no better time than now. "I just wanted to apologize," she said firmly. "I didn't take your feelings into consideration. I overstepped your boundaries, and I apologize."

"Oh," Catria gasped - she recoiled, looking shocked. "Oh! N-No, I... I actually wanted to apologize, too, for snapping at you." 

"You were within your rights," Lucina insisted, shaking her head. "It's clear that I'm making you uncomfortable, and I just wanted to make sure you knew that I won't bother you again." 

"W-wait, isn't that - ?" Catria laughed nervously. All of her composure was gone all at once, as though burned away. "You don't need to put it like that. I - I wasn't bothered, it's just that being around you is - difficult for me, is all." 

"What..." Lucina squinted. "What is that if not discomfort?" 

Catria seemed only more ruffled than before. What was she thinking? Lucina could feel her tension rising. "I just mean that you don't need to be so dramatic about it," she said blankly, after a moment. "I just don't know why you feel like spending so much time around me, is all. I was just doing my job." 

But - No, Lucina caught herself; this is something someone says when they want to defer attention. "I'm sorry that I was overbearing, then," she sighed, satisfied. 

"You weren't!" Catria laughed weakly again. "I - I got mad at you over... some other stupid thing." She looked away, shaking her head; Lucina became aware that the knight was blushing, and her heart jumped into her throat. "I guess," Catria continued, "I was projecting this really stupid fear onto you." 

"Fear?" Lucina asked hoarsely, eyes growing wide. "What fear?"

"It's - it's dumb." Catria laughed again. She could've been Severa's sister. Beside her, Catria's pegasus shuffled a little, nervous. "It's just, the archer from your team - he seemed to think that there was something going on between us that - that clearly _wasn't_. He was just being coarse. But it got under my skin, and..." She sighed heavily, looking up at Lucina, covering her face. "To be honest, I was afraid of coming across wrong. I've never been good with words." 

Lucina stared at her, dumbstruck. Her words weren't processing. 

"Um..." Catria lowered her hands enough to meet Lucina's gaze. "A-Are... you okay?" 

_Something going on between us - it got under my skin - I was afraid of coming across wrong._ Lucina could scream. _WHAT ARE YOU FEELING?!_ She ached for Catria's acceptance, to not have to turn away from someone that might truly care for her, after pushing away so many others - even if... if only for a moment, if she could only have a connection just long enough to feel warm again, but not so long that it would burn her - if only she could know that that was what Catria wanted, but how could she put that feeling into words? Was there even a way? 

Catria was staring. The pegasus was staring, too. Startled, confused, an awkward pause drawing on long. Lucina had never been good with words either, not in her own ears. She used too many and didn't know how to get to the point. So she would surprise herself that day by leaping several steps ahead of herself and putting her feelings as bluntly as she possibly could. She lunged at Catria, latching onto her and pressing their lips together - nothing withheld, no hesitation, an offering of all of the emotion in Lucina's heart that had been building without release, all at once. 

Catria was soft. She felt, strong, too. Sturdy in Lucina's hands. For all of Lucina's weight, the pegasus knight barely swayed. She just stood there in total shock as Lucina kissed her, and when Lucina skittered away, she still remained motionless, wide-eyed, staring through Lucina's eyes. 

Lucina gulped. "I-I..." Have made a mistake. Have made a very terrible mistake. Lucina, how could you? You came here to apologize! "I'm so sorry," she gasped, her voice breaking. "I'm sorry!" She whirled around and dashed back the way she came, before she could humiliate either of them any further. 

 

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

 

"Alright, Catria." Palla slid into the chair opposite her, offering her a glass of tea, which Catria accepted dully. She stared into it absently at first. "You look like you've seen a ghost," her sister sighed. "Go on, drink it." 

"Sorry," Catria mumbled, sighing and closing her eyes to sip it. It was hot and faintly bitter, but it was good for what she was feeling just then. She set it back down. 

"Tell me what happened." When Catria opened her eyes again, Palla was watching her, expectant, concerned, but also a little excited. She wondered how much Palla already had somehow already guessed. As far as Catria could tell, no one knew about the awkward encounter in Fort Jinya but her; with that fortress captured they were poised to push into Shirasagi Castle and end Veronica's occupation of the kingdom entirely. But it was late, and everyone had needed rest, so they had all been un-summoned and would return to formation tomorrow. That left precious little time for venting and advice. Catria didn't have the luxury of keeping things to herself anymore. 

"There's this woman I met," she sighed, slumping and staring through the table, "that I keep seeing around the castle now... someone commented on the first time we met, back in Ostia, about how it was like - like I had fallen for her or something, and he was making fun of - " 

She heard Palla choke. It might've been enough to make Catria laugh if not for her nausea.

"Sorry," her older sister sputted, "fallen for, as in... in love?" 

"Yes," Catria said dryly. 

"You don't sound like this is a joke." 

"Gods but I wish it were." 

Palla took a deep breath. "Go on," she said tersely. Catria wondered if she was stressed, or just trying not to giggle. 

"So, he made fun of that, and it got under my skin," she sighed wearily. "And she kept showing up whenever I tried to make myself busy, after that, and I got all tense and stressed about it until I snapped at her, and today she came to apologize for pushing my boundaries, or... something like that. But it was my fault, she was just being friendly and I was just overreacting because of that moron from before, so I said I was sorry, too, and... I guess... we kind of went back and forth on it, cause we're both too stubborn to just accept an apology, and... she..."

She trailed off. She could practically hear Palla's eyebrows arching. 

"She...?" Palla asked airily. Catria mumbled the answer. "I'm sorry, Catria, you need to use your voice." 

"Kissed me," Catria hissed, her cheeks aflame. She tucked her hair behind her ear distractedly. "So, now I'm just a mess. I feel sick. I don't know what to think."

"Hmm." Palla did not sound amused after all. But she didn't sound too stressed, either. She heard Palla take another quiet sip of her tea, and then a gentle clatter as she set her own cup aside. "How did you feel, when you were around her?" 

"Ugh, gods." Catria straightened up, burying her face in her hands. "Like - I didn't understand why she wanted to spend time around me. I've always felt this way about noblewomen, Palla. I don't belong in their presence. They're just... not like me."

"Catria," Palla whispered. Catria parted her fingers, scowling between them at Palla, who was smiling faintly. "You seem so angry about this. Are you angry that he might've been right?" 

Catria glared for a moment longer. She gnashed her teeth looking for a response. There wasn't one. 

"I guess," she muttered, looking away again in defeat. 

"It was certainly rude of him to say," Palla agreed. "But this is a good thing, Catria, isn't it?" 

" _Is_ it?" Catria sighed. "Is it even - what you think? I... I had it pretty bad for Marth, and that wasn't the same thing as this..."

"Being honest," Palla murmured, "I thought you were always putting it on about Marth. I often thought you were more interested in Caeda than him. Any time you talked about her you got so distant and thoughtful, and any time we questioned you you clammed up. You insisted you were jealous, but you never acted like it."

"Wh-?" Catria's eyes grew wide. But looking back through her own memories... gods... was it so obvious? She could recall so vividly the time she'd worked up her courage to talk to Marth alone, but all she could think to ask him about _was Caeda!_ All the time she was watching them be a cute couple, stewing in her own helplessness, who was she staring at? Why could she remember Caeda's face so clearly, her sweet gaze and her gentle voice of encouragement, the dreaminess that was painted on her as they pulled away from a kiss... "That can't be right," she gasped, shaking her head. "I - but - " 

"You don't need to be ashamed of it," Palla laughed, reaching out to clasp a hand over Catria's. "I was in denial for a while, too. But you can't stay that way forever, you know?"

"Yeah," Catria sighed, slumping down to the table and wrapping her arms over her head. "Gods..." She could feel her breath shaking. Palla reached up to rub her shoulder instead, and soon rose and crossed the table to work both shoulders from behind. They were quiet for a moment. "What do I do?" she mumbled. 

"That's up to you," Palla murmured back. Catria shifted, sighing blissfully as Palla pressed her thumbs into one of Catria's many recurring knots. "But my advice, Catria... don't let your doubts hold you back. Maybe you don't see me as the best role model for this kind of thing, and I'd understand that if so." Catria was quiet. She had not looked highly upon Palla's relationship with Minerva, but... who was she to judge anymore? "But I truly feel," her sister continued, "that when you feel love for someone... it's worth trying to make work."

"I don't know what I'm feeling." 

Palla chuckled quietly above her. "I don't think it will take you long to sort that out." 

 

"You'll break the dummy like that," the girl protested, as Lucina pulled back from her set, panting, holding her practice sword steady in front of her. But this was the second complaint, and just like the first, Lucina ignored it. 

It had been a long time since she had felt so angry. Angry with herself for having no self-control, angry with - well, with the Order, but mostly herself for being turned away that morning. Had they found out about her moment with Catria yesterday? It seemed more like they just didn't think Lucina was up to fighting. Helpless against her feelings, helpless against the enemy, no more than a ghost without a place in the world, just like always. 

She gripped her sword more tightly, glaring defiantly at the misshapen, mortally wounded straw dummy in front of her. She _was_ going to break it. And you know what? This time, she wouldn't even say sorry. 

She twirled, lashing out suddenly with the full strength of her body's rotation, cleaving through the poor thing's tattered 'shirt' - then swiping twice, back then up, then a two-handed, overhead smash that splintered the stand and send the whole thing toppling to the ground. She heard the girl sharing the yard with her start to protest, but without waiting for her to speak Lucina just moved to the next dummy over, raising her sword again. 

She didn't know why she had to feel so angry. This was just a part of her fate, a part that she had long since accepted, or... so she thought. Naga had warned her - warned them all - that if they succeeded, they would be displaced in time, never to belong. They would lose their beginnings, and without that, they would lose who they were. None of this was Catria's fault, of course, or really had much of anything to do with Catria; really, the poor girl was just collateral damage in that war that raged on inside Lucina, a symptom of Lucina's inability to rein herself in, accept the price of her victory, and live with the consequences. A victim of her immaturity. 

Her next stroke struck something hard that stopped her sword in its path - she jumped, startled, but it was just the dummy's stand; she had knocked so much straw out of and off of it that it was really little more than just a messy bundle of cloth on a stake. Sighing, she stepped back, taking a moment to catch her breath again. Two dummies destroyed by her recklessness. She glanced over to the other side of the yard - towards the other girl, with the violet hair - but the stranger seemed to pointedly avoid her gaze. Lucina would have to walk over onto her side to get to one of the dummies that had not yet been destroyed. Her limbs felt heavy, her clothes laden and sticky with sweat. She had been out here for what felt like hours, and was only growing more frustrated. Maybe she should stop. 

"Oh!" 

Lucina turned at the voice, not immediately recognizing it - but recognizing the bright blue hair of its speaker immediately. She stepped back, facing her fully, shocked. "Catria!" she breathed. "I - I thought you were part of the siege team!"

"N-No, um - " Catria rubbed the back of her neck, looking away. "I'm - My sister - she said I shouldn't go, cause I'm not - I'm not feeling well, I guess. So she..." 

"Oh." Lucina had trouble deciding what all of that meant, and chose to believe it didn't really matter. What mattered much more was how exactly to escape this horrible situation before anything happened. And... also, maybe, it mattered what was going on with Catria's face, because she was looking kind of distressed and confused herself. Maybe - she should say something? "A-Are you... here to tidy up?" 

"Yeah." Catria nodded numbly. "Er, you don't have to stop or anything." 

"I was just going to take a break," Lucina interjected. She glanced to the side. The girl from before was mysteriously gone. "Um." Doesn't matter. Stop daydreaming. Look at Catria. "I can - I can help?" 

"Anna gave me the key to the storage shed," Catria explained in a faint voice, "but I haven't... do you know where...?"

"Ah! Yes. Back this way." She waved behind her. Catria followed her. They walked towards the back of the courtyard. 

This section of the castle, as Lucina understood it, was all but unused before the Order of Heroes had formed. Much of the Askrian castle was like that; this wing, and several of the wings that were being used for living space, were gorgeous and in good repair, but it clearly had been a long time since they'd been lived in. So the back part of this courtyard was rather beautifully overgrown, and the path to the shed was a bit of a tight fit. Catria was very close to her. She didn't have to be, but Lucina could feel her presence just a step behind. If she stopped suddenly they'd run into each other. 

"You said you weren't feeling well," Lucina offered, her voice rather higher pitched than she'd intended. "Are you alright?"

"I-I'm fine," Catria stammered. Lucina ought to have glanced back at her, but she wasn't sure if she could take it if she did. "I just... I didn't get a whole lot of sleep because, er... something's on my mind that... w-well..." She trailed off with an irritable sigh.

"Oh, I don't mean to pry," Lucina gasped.

"You're not prying," Catria said quietly. "I'll explain in a second." 

Lucina's heartrate jumped to a sprint. This couldn't be happening. She was getting way ahead of herself. Right? 

When they reached the shed, Lucina brushed up against the door, revealing it was already unlocked for some reason; she ducked inside, as if she hoped to find more space to breathe in there, but of course it was just a _shed_. There was almost no space at all. There were a few extra dummies lined along the wall, but mostly just a haphazard pile of sacks and a stack of hay for making more, along with gardening tools that Lucina was sure were well-rusted by now, all bundled together and leaning into a corner. 

She turned around. Catria had followed her into the shed. But whatever butterflies were upsetting Lucina's stomach grew still at the sight of her expression. Catria's face was a rather pretty shade of pink; she was avoiding Lucina's gaze, lips trembling and eyes downcast. For just a moment, Lucina lost herself in a surge of concern for the knight, afraid that Catria was hurt - and instinctively eager to defend her from that hurt, as well. 

"Catria," she whispered. "Are you alright?" 

"I... y-yeah." Catria drew herself up. She sounded like she could have been near tears, but Lucina wasn't sure; she couldn't see the girl's face well enough to tell. "I... wanted to tell you something, b-but I'm having a hard time... knowing how to say it." 

"It's okay," Lucina breathed. She thought she could hear her heart racing, just as clearly as she could feel it. "Take your time." 

Catria nodded gratefully and closed her eyes, her thoughtful silence drawing on long. She was breathing very heavily. "I..." She hesitated, then gulped and continued. "Yesterday... when you, um..." 

Lucina's eyes grew wide, and the numbing concern faded rapidly. With mingled horror and excitement, it began to dawn on her that the overwhelming sexual tension was not just her imagination. 

Catria, meanwhile, grew bashful again and turned away, covering her face. "I-I mean... ugh." She sighed. "I think that I - I might have... come across wrong, when we were..." She sighed again, angrily. "I didn't..." 

Lucina wanted to tell her to take her time again. Half to comfort her, half to stall, desperately, as she tried to force herself to think of an escape. But she couldn't speak.

"I'm no good with words," Catria growled, shaking her head. "Fuck it." She grabbed Lucina by the collar and pulled. 

 

Lucina's doubts shattered the instant their lips touched. She clung to Catria, kissing her fiercely back; the knight gave a sound of surprise and, perhaps, vague protest, and Lucina lowered her head to Catria's neck instead to allow her to breathe in harsh, jagged gasps. But they couldn't stand to be apart for long. Just long enough that they could breathe. 

Catria, for her part, seemed taken aback but clearly receptive. She pulled at Lucina's top weakly, quickly adapting the movements of her lips and tongue from Lucina's example but allowing Lucina to take the lead; Lucina turned them partially, flailing with her right arm until she found the shed door and shoved it closed. Then she pushed Catria backwards against it, trailing kisses down her neck, feeling Catria quivering under her hands and lips, listening to her gasping for breath, feeling the heaving of her chest against Lucina's; Catria's hands wrapped feebly around Lucina's waist, gripping her cloth and belt for dear life as though it were all that was holding her upright. 

But Lucina's shirt began to rise, and Catria had to clench her fingers again - and again - bunching it up in her fists as it slowly peeled away from Lucina's damp skin; as it started to rise above her stomach Lucina pulled away slightly, raising her arms and worming herself out of it - it came free in Catria's hands, and Catria pulled it back, blinking doe-eyed as Lucina righted herself again. The air felt soothingly cold against her exposed skin; she closed her eyes for a moment, very briefly enjoying it, before refocusing on Catria, who... was staring rather sweetly at Lucina, now. Her eyes were tracing Lucina's well-toned muscles, the definition in her arms and shoulders worked up from a great deal of sword practice. It actually even made Lucina a little self-conscious. 

She pulled back a little, trying to push her shoulders together, hoping to accentuate her meager breasts as much as she could. "H-How do I look?" she gulped. Catria looked up at her blankly, as if confused that they were speaking at all - without responding, she leaned in to kiss Lucina again, and this time with a meek assertiveness she kissed down _Lucina's_ neck instead. Each press of her lips made the cold air feel sharper against her skin, sending shivers down Lucina's spine as Catria kissed the more sensitive tendons near the base - and then continuing down; Lucina stood on her toes, presenting herself, raising her arms as Catria pulled the strap of fabric Lucina used for a 'bra' when fighting - Lucina realized it was soaked, but before she could apologize Catria had tossed it aside and nestled into her bosom, kissing only more firmly still - sucking faintly against her skin as she pulled away. Just like before it left Lucina's skin icy cold when Catria left it, and it was enough to drive faint whimpers of desire into Lucina's voice. 

Animatedly, Lucina tugged at Catria's shirt next, and after another sweet, dazed moment of confusion Catria agreeably lifted her arms to allow it to be removed, too - Lucina wasted no time in tearing Catria's bra away too, then hooked her arms under Catria's trembling thighs and hefted her up - Catria yelped - pressing her back against the wall, now hoisted up so Lucina had easy access to _her_ chest, instead. She felt distantly relieved to find that Catria was not all that much larger than she was, and seemingly every bit as sensitive, panting and whimpering as Lucina toyed with her with lips and teeth and tongue all in equal measure; she could feel Catria struggling to breathe, as her stomach pressed faintly into Lucina's breasts, shuddering and buckling as Catria squirmed against the wall, feet and toes arching in the air behind Lucina... 

As Catria's faint whining took on a more urgent tone, Lucina pulled her away from the wall, turning around and carefully lowering her onto the haystack behind them. Catria laid herself out, arms crossed over her face as she tried to catch her breath; Lucina could see she was starting to sweat too, cheeks flushed bright red, chest heaving with each hungry gasp for air. She was a sight to behold. How many times had Lucina wished such a sight could be hers, and denied it...? She shivered, a guilty chill piercing her, but shrugged it off for now - she had started something, and it would hardly be proper of her not to finish it. 

She knelt beside Catria, helping her finish undressing herself. She had a slight frame, toned and supple particularly in her upper body, but more effeminate in her face and in the softer curves of her hips and thighs. Lucina settled onto her knees in front of Catria, who sat up faintly on the haystack as though it were a misshapen throne; the knight shivered as Lucina ran her hands along her thighs and sides, before firmly gripping her bottom and pulling her forward a little. Catria squeaked, spreading her arms and digging them into the hay a little to find purchase, while Lucina kissed her stomach... and then further down, slowly, giving Catria plenty of time to protest. She didn't. 

Instead, she gasped rather sharply when Lucina first kissed her clit, sending a thrill through Lucina as she heard it. She kissed again, then set her lips around it, applying just a little suction. Catria replied with a weak groan, aimlessly shifting her hips, and Lucina answered her indecision with a firmer suck, then by pressing it with her tongue, drawing circles around it, pulling away for a moment before flicking it - Catria's heavy, measured breathing melted into ragged gasps within seconds, interrupted with increasingly girlish whimpers and moans. She could feel Catria's thighs flexing in her hands, trying to find a way to ease the tension radiating through her. Satisfied now with Catria's state, Lucina lowered herself just a bit more, pressing her tongue firmly against Catria's outer folds - and then thrusting inward, digging as deep as she could, and working her entrance with her lips in the meantime. 

Catria immediately let out a sharp, keening moan, writhing helplessly in Lucina's grasp. Lucina watched her from over the erratic rise and fall of her chest, as Catria arched her back, then buckled, clenching her teeth with hissing breaths before her lips broke open in shock to moan, lower lip quivering, shoulders rattling. All the while the knight's eyes remained squeezed firmly shut. Lucina wondered if she had ever been with a woman before. The answer seemed to be no. 

Her cries rose to a crescendo before long, bucking her hips against Lucina's face, a desperate whine punctuating every breath; the end came moments after, with a shaky girlish squeal. Slowly, Lucina lifted herself up as Catria slumped to catch her breath. They'd made quite a mess of Lucina's face, and she took a moment trying to at least gather the worst of it on her fingers. Once she felt satisfied she was clean, she leaned down again to kiss Catria's stomach gently, soundlessly questioning her. And for a moment Catria didn't answer, still wheezing, her eyes now dimly open and staring sightlessly as the ceiling. 

If this really was Catria's first time, Lucina thought, maybe it was best not to ask too much from her. She was probably rather overwhelmed. She looked up after a few kisses more; Catria lifted her head up weakly to stare back, blinking twice to clear her vision. "Is that all?" Catria asked, voice faint. "Don't you... want a turn...?" 

Well. She did. Very badly. But! "It's alright if you need to rest," Lucina offered with a smile. But Catria shook her head. 

"Not fair," she muttered, pushing herself upright with a groan. "I started this..." 

"Did you?" Lucina arched an eyebrow, but Catria didn't answer her, instead pulling Lucina over to her - Lucina stumbled against the hay and caught herself hovering over Catria, faces inchest apart. Catria hesitated cutely before kissing her - just once, sweet and brief, like an experiment. Lucina smiled down at her, brushing a mess of Catria's hair to the side and behind her ear, restoring some of its former straightness. 

"I guess we should flip over?" Catria mumbled. Lucina nodded, holding Catria's shoulders and rolling sideways; now Catria was hovering over her as she laid back in the hay. Lucina hesitated, chewing her lip, considering saying something - but Catria didn't wait for her, lowering herself to kiss between Lucina's breasts, disrupting Lucina's thoughts with little shivers and chills just like before. One of Catria's hands drifted down to rest on Lucina's inner thigh; Lucina spread her legs hopefully, but Catria was much more hesitant, pressing her own thigh forward into Lucina's crotch first. So, Lucina ground her hips against that instead. Just that stimulation alone was enough that she was starting to feel out of breath herself, the gnawing heat of lust building up in her swiftly. 

She registered all at once that maybe she had rushed Catria a little - Lucina was not exactly used to taking things slowly for herself - but the knight didn't seem to have any protest. She rocked her hips forward and down, pushing her thigh into Lucina's movements, whlie her lips roamed across Lucina's upper body - tending first to her breasts, but then up to Lucina's neck, across her shoulder and then back to her neck... it was only finally when she drifted down to Lucina's stomach, which meant shifting back and kneeling, she finally carefully pressed her fingers to Lucina's entrance. By this time Lucina was very very ready; she whimpered and tried to squirm her hips forward and, getting the hint, Catria carefully slid one finger inside her. It was good - Lucina groaned and arched her back - but she just didn't like taking it slow! "Two," she breathed. "Please." And, Catria nodded, carefully sliding a second finger in. 

She had a sweet, tender touch at first; Lucina arched her back a little, rocking her hips slowly but firmly into Catria's movements, hoping to encourage her. But Catria's wrist moved without pause or hesitation. Lucina made a mental note to try slow with her and see how she reacted. Either way, as much as Lucina instinctively wished to accelerate, the pleasure built up all the same. It didn't take long for Catria to find just the right places to draw shivers and gasps out of Lucina, and she teased and stroked with that same near-agonizing patience until Lucina began to realize the steadiness of it was even more overwhelming than mere speed. 

"A-ah -- " Her voice escaped her early, a harsh gasp and a whimper. "I...!" She tried to find words - to ask her to speed up? Slow down? Give her a break? Pressure and heat were building in Lucina's core, unstoppable, nearing a bursting point. She was breathing fast. The room was dark, Catria was so warm, the hay was so soft. "I-I," she tried again, but all her breath came out of her at once, a moan gently guided out of her rather than forced. "Oh, gods - " Something sparked along her spine and she shuddered violently, arching her back for a moment. "Catria," she whispered urgently, "Catria, oh - !"

"That good?" Catria replied, breathy and reverent. Lucina managed to look down at her, having to squint to make her out through some blurriness - were her eyes watering? The girl smiled bashfully, lowering herself between Lucina's legs with a sweetly demure expression, letting out her tongue to press against Lucina's clit - 

"OH - " Lucina spasmed and clapped a hand over her mouth. This was so much more intense than anything she could ever give herself. She could feel the pressure inside her building out of control, then radiating outward into her whole body - the closest she could ever reach to orgasm - but it wasn't any kind of release; it was just strangling, overwhelming, divine. Lucina could do nothing but breathe in exalted desperation. No matter how harsh and ragged her gasps, she never had enough air. Sweat had broken out across her body again, her hips and stomach bucking, fingers clenching into the hay desperate for purchase somewhere... 

She feared Catria would be put off, that she'd try to push Lucina over, but she didn't. She was so patient. SO patient. Lucina was having trouble thinking or seeing straight. She had never thought of it like this before, but in Catria's hands, she never _wanted_ to cum. If Catria could make her feel like this forever - ! 

"Catria..." She had to force strangled sounds from a weathered throat, narrowly gulping down air in between. "Catri... a-ah..." An electric pulse rocked her from the tip of Catria's tongue all the way into Lucina's throat, and a loud, long moan escaped her. 

She felt Catria lift herself up a little. "Almost there?" But Lucina cried out in agony.

"Don't stop," she whimpered, "please gods don't stop - !" And Catria didn't waste time answering, she just wrapped her lips around Lucina's clit again and Lucina was lost in perfect oblivion once more. 

 

Lucina was at least dimly aware when Catria pulled her hand away - suddenly and instinctively afraid, she made to sit up, to apologize, but Catria didn't give her the time to speak before thrusting her tongue into Lucina as replacement. Renewed pleasure washed over her and she slumped with a blissful, shaking sigh. 

But she managed to keep her head up for a moment. Long enough to watch Catria's now-soaked hand drift between her own legs, and to understand what was happening. There was something electric about the idea that pleasuring Lucina was itself so tempting that Catria couldn't stop, but couldn't bear not to pleasure herself, either. She saw Catria's face tighten, heard and felt her whimpering into Lucina's crotch, and satisfied with that Lucina slumped back again, rolling her hips against Catria's lips and tongue. 

Some indeterminate time later - a few seconds, a few minutes, a few days? - Catria's face pulled away too, but Lucina had heard it coming in her voice. For a few moments, Catria breathed as fast and harshly as Lucina had been, and Lucina slid down into her knees in front of the knight and wrapped her arms around her, trying not to obstruct her movement - it was hard, controlling her own body was quite difficult at this point - pressing teeth into her neck, reveling in the gasp and strangled cry that emerged from Catria's lips...

She heard Catria's breath catch, felt her hips buck once then stiffen - Lucina kissed heatedly up to Catria's ear, wrapping her hands around Catria's bottom and squeezing none too gently, enveloping Catria in her as the smaller girl quivered through her second climax. Catria's free hand feebly wrapped around Lucina's midsection, pressing their damp bodies against one another; for a moment, Lucina ground aimlessly against her abdomen, whimpering, blindly seeking satisfaction until she felt Catria's other hand come free. Then she wrapped her legs around one of Catria's, grinding firmly against that, and Catria tried to tighten her grip and return the gesture. Her lips found Lucina's, and every part of them was soon locked in embrace - legs tight around legs, fingers digging into each other's shoulders and back, tongues coiled tightly around the other's tongue. 

But as intimate and warm as this felt, it wasn't like before. Lucina could feel the high finally leaving her, slowly but surely. She slumped backwards against the hay, pulling Catria atop her again, and she felt Catria's movements slowing a little too. They guided each other down until they were laying beside one another, lips locked and tongues dancing now slowly rather than feverishly, embrace still close and tight but no longer desperate. And only after another few heavenly moments of that did they finally break apart to breathe. 

Lucina opened her eyes first. Catria looked like she might faint. Somehow she looked rather pristine, in spite of Lucina's cum and spittle marking her lips - her hair in particular didn't seem too fazed, but that was what such a short cut was good for. Either way it gave Catria an adorably innocent look, driving home the feeling that Lucina had defiled her purity. But it was hard to feel too guilty or upset about that in the aftermath. 

It took a few moments of panting before Catria opened her eyes, too. They were dim and her eyelids hung heavy like she might fall asleep. On a whim, Lucina cupped her cheek, smiling warmly; Catria's gaze turned up to her, all but adoring. 

"How was it?" Lucina asked softly. 

Catria gulped. She seemed to struggle, not physically but mentally, with her next words. It almost made Lucina worry, but -

"I think I'm really gay," Catria mumbled. Lucina couldn't help but giggle.


End file.
